Breaking news:

Jazz crooner Norah Jones has announced her engagement to former Leeds United midfielder David Batty and will be undertaking a post-wedding tour of the Pennines under her new name of Norah Batty. Tracks she will be performing include "Mushy Peas Blues", "Whippet Up And Start Again", "Flat Cap Rhapsody", "Ecky Thump Stomp" and "The Ballad Of Arthur Scargill".

p.s.-If actress Amanda Barrie had a love child with Aston Villa midfielder Gareth Barry and christened it Bartholemew what do you reckon on the stardom potential of someone called Barry Barrie-Barry?

Hoss