on 25 Aug 2004, Hoss received this email:

Hello selected wedding guests:

We are making up some cds to play between the band sessions at our wedding bash and would like your all time number one favourite dance song that would get you up from your seat and on the dance floor immediately. If choosing one is too difficult then send a couple but no more than three. It would be a great help, many thanks. Elizabeth

Hoss replied:

Dear Liz, Regarding your quest for foot-stomping wedding tunes I suggest that you look no further than the godfather of rock himself, Sir Cliff Richard. In fact, sack the band, unseat the disc jockey, tear down the marquee and erect a 200 foot obelisk complete with mosh-pit and 20 megawatt sound system. Get everyone to kneel in the pit at the base of the monolith and pray as you blast out Richard's entire collection of classics at 6000 decibels so that all those within a radius of 500 miles can hear the dulcet tones of the sex-beast himself. Play the tunes in chronological order starting with the sublime "Move It" (a-movin'-an'-a-groovin' yeh yeh) to the totally awesome "Millenium Prayer". If anyone objects, simply chuckle like Sue Barker, shove a tennis racquet up their arse and shout "Congratulations!".

Rock on. Hoss